The other day I was watching a movie about zombies - I think it was a Resident Evil incarnation. I know, I usually watch only vampire movies, but there were none on at the time. Also, I have come to the realization that I will watch basically anything that Milla Jovovich is in, not because I particularly like her as an actress, but because I can't seem to look away. It's like the Puppy Bowl. She's just so cute - standing around, looking confused, kicking ass.
ANYWAY, getting off topic here, the point is that I began to ponder the central tenet of zombie movies. Please keep in mind that I don't watch many, so I could be way off here. As I understand it, (and feel free to correct me if I'm wrong, my good fellow nerds) zombies seek out the living and eat them. So far, so good.
Here's where I get confused. If the zombies are eating the living, as you often see in the popular aerial shot of a crowd of the undead converging on a hapless victim/martyr with only three bullets left, then how come said victims are always seen later in the film, themselves shambling zombies, missing exactly ZERO body parts?
What, exactly, are the zombies eating? If fifty zombies attacked a single human, you'd think that the end result would be fifty temporarily satiated zombies picking their teeth with finger bones, possibly wondering if they had any Tums left back at Zombie HQ.
But in the movies what you end up with is fifty-one zombies, with the victim often not even featuring any bite marks.
And I don't get the eating brains argument either. I thought that the only way to kill zombies was to shoot them in the head, thereby stopping whatever brain function they have. But if they EAT brains, and the person whose brain they ate ALSO becomes a zombie, then you'd have a zombie with no brain, no? And how do they get the brains out? A straw? Egyptian nose hook? Kind of complicated procedure for a zombie with no fine motor skills.
Please folks, fill me in. I am genuinely confused by this. That's why I stick to vampires.
2 comments:
i think they just bite people. and their saliva has the zombie virus. and i assume you've seen night of the living dead, and all those? those ones perpetuate the brain-eating theory, which doesn't make much sense, but if you watch 28 days later, i think that's the zombie movie with the most logic involved, and it's about bodily fluids. sort of like a zombie std.
Ohhhhh. No, I didn't watch those. Which is why I was confused. Every one I've seen talks about zombies being motivated by hunger, etc.
Well, you're not going to fill up much just by biting people!
Post a Comment